I had a Kettle One (or three) in his honor...   

Hey you motherfuckers!  Testing one two three.  How do you get a drink around here?  It ain’t 4 in the morning.  I shattered my hip.  It was a tad painful.  I was voted the rehab captain of the fourth floor wiffle ball team.  We made it to the Hospital World Series and lost game seven 4 - 3.  I preached defense and base running and sacrifice bunts, and all that.  It was my fault we lost game seven.  I knew Martha had trouble with the inside slider and normally she would have taken that pitch.  But I called for the hit and run.  It ended (the game) with a strike ‘em out, throw ‘em out double play.

Bill Melton... he gone.
Willie Harris shall eternally suck.

  Doubt the “leak” came from the White Sox as the report didn’t come from Bob Nightengale.